“For this is the great error of our day: that the physicians separate the soul from the body.” – Hippocrates
Part One: You’re Not Sick, You’re Unhappy!
My next book is going to be called You’re Not Sick, You’re Unhappy! I’m not kidding. That’s how intimately I feel our emotions touch our health. I am not a psychologist or mental health expert. I am a person who has learned through personal experience how to reverse my chronic illness and heal my life. And I helped several other people transform their health and their lives. While there are always multiple factors involved, I’ve observed over and over that there is a strong emotional component to virtually everyone’s chronic illness, including mine.
It’s really quite obvious why: emotions are visceral sensations felt in the body. When we are stressed, our neck can get sore, we may get knots in our shoulders, and as the pressure builds, we may develop a headache. When we are anxious, we may feel like our stomach is in knots, and we may feel nauseous or have diarrhea. When we are grieving, we may feel a deep ache or emptiness in the middle of our chest.
Humans have recognized the link between emotions and health since ancient times. Traditional healing systems such as Ayurveda and Traditional Chinese Medicine have taught the interrelatedness of the mind, body, and spirit for thousands of years.1
In the last 20 years, we have seen considerable growth in the science of psychoneuroimmunology (PNI), which explores how our psychology affects our neurological and immune systems. Studies continue to demonstrate how chronic negative emotional states play a key role in the development and exacerbation of inflammatory diseases such as heart disease, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, Alzheimer’s, and autoimmune disorders. I believe we can no longer deny the clear chemical links between our emotions and the regulatory function of the endocrine and immune systems through the central nervous system.2
Emotional Stressors that Can Affect Your Health
In my book The Thyroid Cure I discuss some of the most common sources of emotional stressors that can affect your health. I’ll share them here as well. See if any apply to you.
- Death of a loved one
- Divorce, separation, or bad break up
- Being in an unhappy or unfulfilling marriage or relationship
- Hurtful betrayals, such as finding out your partner is having an affair or that a loved one has been dishonest with you
- Loss of a pet
- Traumas that can cause post-traumatic stress syndrome (PTSD), such as war, childhood abuse (sexual, physical, emotional), abusive relationships, rape, spiritual/religious abuse, or witnessing a crime or abuse
- Unbalanced brain chemistry due to sugar, drug, or alcohol addiction or poor nutrition and toxins
- Estrangement from your family, emotionally or financially
- Loneliness—lack of close relationships
- Lack of fun or play
- Moving
- Trouble with the law
- Problems with your children
- Caring for aging, sick, or mentally disabled parents or relatives
- Loss or change of job, including retirement
- Loss of a close friend
- Feeling exploited or underappreciated
- Experiencing racism, classism, or sexual discrimination
- Vocational stress from demanding bosses and customers, or a job that is boring and/or unfulfilling
- Financial crisis from debt and living beyond one’s means, not having enough money to pay the bills, or even bankruptcy
- Being chronically overtired, overcommitted, or rushed by life situations
- Witnessing “state-of-the-world” trauma such as war, poverty, global warming, etc.
- Emotional stress includes such emotional states such as anxiety, frustration, anger, rage, and sadness.
This list is by no mean exhaustive. There seems to be no end to the emotional stressors we face. It’s important for each of us, whether we’re healthy or suffering with an illness, to take the time to honor our life challenges. Sometimes just to be able to share our experience with another is enough to lessen the impact of a traumatic experience. In other cases we may need professional support. My point is that emotional stress is real and affects every aspect of our mind, body and spirit.
Is Your “Story” Making You Sick?
Unfortunately, bad things happen to good people all the time. Each of us will likely experience one or more of the emotional stresses listed above at some point in our lives. While these experiences can be very painful, it turns out that our thoughts about these experiences might have more of an impact on our health than the actual experience.
Cognitive stress is the way we think about or assess our traumas and experiences; it’s how we create the stories that help us understand our reality. These are the stories we tell ourselves (and usually others) about our past and present experiences. Some of these stories are like poison pills we mix up for ourselves, out of toxic ingredients like victimhood and shame.
If we’re not careful, our inner dialogue can start to sound something like this: “My life would have been great if not for what he/she/they did to me!” or “I never get what I need. I’m trapped. My life sucks. Nobody loves me. I’m worthless. I’m damaged goods. I don’t deserve love. I hate myself. I wish I were dead—maybe then they will miss me.”
Toxic stories typically include feelings of shame, martyrdom, irrational demands, lack of gratitude, lack of empathy and compassion, and unrealistic expectations of others and ourselves.
Purposelessness has to do with feelings of meaninglessness, inability to live in the now, or lack of inspiration, motivation, serenity, spirituality, or a higher purpose. When we experience these states, we tend to lose our enthusiasm, curiosity, and excitement for life. We may feel depressed and disconnected, and see each day as another hurdle to overcome, instead of a great adventure to explore.
Symptoms of Emotional, Cognitive, and Purposelessness Stress
- Feelings of being “stressed-out” all the time
- Constant worry about the future
- Constant anxiety about the past
- Persistent anxiety about the state of the world
- Feeling spaced out; disoriented
- Memory problems; forgetfulness
- Feeling unsafe or unable to speak one’s truth; lying; or withholding
- Constant worry about finances
- Feeling overcommitted or unable to keep commitments
- Inability to say “no” at work, in relationships, or with family
- Inability to forgive, harboring negativity over past events
- Chronic feelings of guilt or shame
- Loneliness, boredom, or isolation
- Frustration, anger, or hostility
- Confusion
- Lack of gratitude; not appreciating the good things in your life
- Lack of empathy; not caring how others feel or understanding their feelings
- Feeling left out, abandoned, or neglected
- Feeling misunderstood
- Feeling trapped, or that you don’t have choices
- Feeling hopeless, depressed, or dejected about your life
- Feeling that you have no life purpose, no mission, no reason to go onwards
- Feeling apathetic; not caring for your health and welfare or that of others
- Lack of enthusiasm, curiosity, and excitement for life
- Unrealistic expectations of self and others; demanding perfection, fairness, and approval
- Inability to let go of past hurts—holding a grudge
Which of the symptoms above apply to you?
Are there any additional symptoms you have of psychological stress that are not on the list?
It’s important to make the distinction here between the healthy experience of feeling negative emotions as a temporary response to situations in our lives and the experience of chronic negative emotional states. At times, intense feelings such as guilt, anger, resentment, and sadness are a normal part of the human experience for all of us. Allowing ourselves to fully feel these uncomfortable feelings seems to be a natural part of our maturation process, one that helps shape our character and teaches us empathy.
However, sometimes we may have a difficult time moving through life’s painful experiences, and can find ourselves stuck in chronic negative emotional states that eventually wear us down on a physiological level.
The bottom line is that chronic emotional distress makes us sick. If we are to get well, we must assess how much time we spend “stressed-out” and in negative emotional states and do something to change things for the better.
The journey of psychological and emotional healing is as complex and individual as life itself. I share parts of my own journey in The Thyroid Cure.
In Part Two of this series I’ll discuss some profound method others are using to heal from the past and I’ll have some expert interviews as well.
In the mean time, I want to honor the unique challenges of your life and the traumas and experiences you’ve been through. That journey has brought you to this website. I can’t tell you what path of transformation will work best for you. What I can tell you is that healing is possible and I’m inspired to share with you what I learn from others along this path of healing.
Love,
Michelle
References:
- Viljoen M, Panzer A, Roos J.L, Bodemer W. Psychoneuroimmunology: From Philosophy, Intuition and Folklore to a Recognized Science. South African Journal of Science 99 July/August 2003: 332. http://connection.ebscohost.com/c/articles/11532011/psychoneuroimmunology-from-philosophy-intuition-folklore-recognized-science
- Viljoen M, Panzer A, Roos J.L, Bodemer W. Psychoneuroimmunology: From Philosophy, Intuition and Folklore to a Recognized Science. South African Journal of Science 99 July/August 2003: 332. http://connection.ebscohost.com/c/articles/11532011/psychoneuroimmunology-from-philosophy-intuition-folklore-recognized-science
Michelle Corey, C.N.W.C., FMC, is a Wellness Recovery Specialist, Certified Nutrition and Wellness Consultant, researcher and author. Michelle studied holistic nutrition at Clayton College of Natural Health and completed a comprehensive 2-year practical program at Academy of Functional Medicine and Genomics. Since reversing her autoimmune condition, Michelle has helped hundreds of people reverse autoimmune and other chronic conditions. She is currently an advisor to the Academy of Functional Medicine and Genomics and the Functional Medical University. She is a member of the Institute of Functional Medicine and the National Association of Healthcare Advocacy Consultants. Michelle and offers Functional Mind-Body healing retreats, workshops and online courses.
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